Harriette Cole: Did I make a mistake with the men at the bar?

DEAR HARRIETTE I am hoping to get back into dating but I m a bit of an introvert Related Articles Harriette Cole My teen s sports season was ruined and I don t know how to help her Harriette Cole This woman didn t belong in our VIP area Why wouldn t anyone kick her out Harriette Cole The bouncer rejected me and my friends went in anyway Harriette Cole I m ready to live like a grown-up but my best friend isn t Harriette Cole Their vacation plan is setting me up to be the bad sibling In recent days I was out with chosen friends majority of of whom are in relationships and we spotted a scant handsome men at the bar My friends encouraged me to go over and introduce myself but I hesitated I notified my friends that the men had looked over to us a scarce times so I didn t see why I had to approach them My friends explained me that I keep missing opportunities because I am not willing to initiate or do something different for a change Is that true Are my traditional hopes and standards for romance keeping me from my next relationship Traditional Courting DEAR TRADITIONAL COURTING Your friends encouragement was great Walking over to say hello is not a marriage proposal but it is a great way to break the ice Sometimes when people are in groups it can feel daunting for someone to come over to talk to one person What may be happening for you is that you see someone intriguing and that person sees you but both of you are nervous to say hello Drum up the courage to make the first gesture and see what happens from there Dating can be tough but if you put yourself out there you just may meet someone special who shares your values DEAR HARRIETTE I just started my new job and my boss has given me little guidance When I reach out with questions the responses are either short vague or delayed I was expecting a few kind of structured onboarding or training or at least regular check-ins to help me transition smoothly but that hasn t happened The bulk days I m left trying to piece together things on my own and I have no idea if I m meeting expectations or totally missing the mark This lack of communication is starting to take a toll on my confidence I worked hard to get this job and I want to prove myself but it s hard when I don t know if I m doing things the right way I don t want to come across as incompetent but at the same time I feel like I m failing absolutely because I don t have the information or endorsement I need I ve started to dread going to work because I feel so directionless Should I be more assertive in pushing for feedback and clarification or do I liability annoying my boss by asking too countless questions Is this a red flag about the work values at this company or is it just something I need to push through as I get adjusted Need Guidance DEAR NEED GUIDANCE Sadly in countless businesses employees don t get much guidance It is wonderful when companies have onboarding programs but yours is not one of them Related Articles Dear Abby I feel like reporting the neighbor kid s dangerous behavior Asking Eric The receptionist paid for screwing up my account Harriette Cole My teen s sports season was ruined and I don t know how to help her Miss Manners I didn t intend it as a gag gift but they laughed at it all night Dear Abby I m tired of living alone while my girlfriend lives with her husband Look around and notice employees who seem to have things under control and who have been there for a while Befriend someone who may be willing to talk to you about how things work at your company Find someone who can be helpful but be careful about sharing how much you don t know Request a meeting with your boss to review your work Explain that you know that they are busy but you want to be productive and you need a limited minutes of their time in order to make sure you are in alignment Doing this is part of their job so don t give up until you get your meeting Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO