Harriette Cole: I haven’t gone back to the office since this embarrassing incident

DEAR HARRIETTE A sparse weeks ago I had a really embarrassing accident at work I tripped in the office and split my pants right in front of my colleagues Related Articles Harriette Cole He wasn t a good boyfriend so why can t I forget him Harriette Cole She walked out of the party saying my new girlfriend and I embarrassed her Harriette Cole When I complain about the hazing at work they say my generation is soft Harriette Cole My roommate s annoying Post-its are affecting my peace of mind Harriette Cole This advice from my therapist seems drastic Should I go for it anyway On top of that I sprained my ankle in the fall so I had to take a few time off to recover While I was out I kept imagining everyone replaying that moment in their minds and I worried about what they thought of me Now that I m certainly cleared to return to the office I feel a mix of anxiety dread and self-consciousness I keep picturing co-workers whispering or snickering behind my back even though preponderance of them supposedly don t even think about it anymore The thought of walking back into the office makes me physically tense and I ve been considering asking to work from home longer just to avoid facing everyone I know that it was an accident and everyone has embarrassing moments but emotionally I feel like I m trapped in that one humiliating instant I want to be professional and get back into my routine but I m not sure how to shake off this embarrassment or rebuild my confidence in front of my co-workers How can I return to the office without letting this one circumstance bother me Back To Work DEAR BACK TO WORK It is highly unlikely that your co-workers have been fixated on your fall They should be doing their jobs Additionally largest part people are so self-absorbed that they don t obsess over other people s issues Go back to work with your head held high When someone asks how you are doing give an uplifting assessment If someone mentions the fall or you splitting your pants laugh it off It was a moment in the past Be in the present and get back to work If you let it go they will too DEAR HARRIETTE My husband lately lost his job There is a ton of paperwork to fill out and he is dragging his feet instead of doing it Whenever I ask him about it he blows me off and says I am nagging him He has reliably been the principal breadwinner in our family and I need him to take this situation seriously I cannot jump in and handle it all Several things only he can do How can I get him to focus and handle his business We have three kids and I need him to step up and figure out his next initiatives What To Do DEAR WHAT TO DO Sit down with your husband again Tell him you don t mean to nag you just want to help Related Articles Miss Manners What could I have done about my guest s perplexing parenting decision Dear Abby Would the woman in the gym want to know what her pants are doing Asking Eric I realized where I knew my date from and the horrible memory came rushing back Harriette Cole He wasn t a good boyfriend so why can t I forget him Miss Manners She was visiting someone else and required to use my place as a hotel Ask him if you can see the paperwork that has to be filled out and help where you are able In as pleasant a tone as you can muster urge him to carve out time to make a plan for his next efforts so that he can continue to protect the family If he necessities to apply for unemployment benefits look it up online and show him the website While he may get angry do whatever efforts you can to make it easy for him to complete the tasks at hand This is a tense time Try to stay calm and not to take his snippiness personally Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO