Harriette Cole: I’m ready to live like a grown-up, but my best friend isn’t

DEAR HARRIETTE I m starting a new job soon and I ve just turned so a goal I set for myself was to build healthier habits this year I ve been trying to establish better routines be more responsible with money and prioritize my strength Related Articles Harriette Cole Their vacation plan is setting me up to be the bad sibling Harriette Cole She reported she dated him too and now I feel weird about it Harriette Cole I got a great job and my mom is trying to make me feel guilty about it Harriette Cole I bought a house in another city but my boss won t let me leave Harriette Cole My uncle says the crash was an accident and he won t pay for my car Meanwhile my best friend still wants to go out and party almost every night and when I turn her down she acts hurt or gets upset with me I feel like we re no longer on the same page almost like we re living in two different life stages and it s becoming harder to relate to her I don t want to come across as judgmental or like I think I m better than her but the reality is that our lifestyles don t match anymore How can I step away from this friendship without creating drama or making her feel like I m criticizing her choices I still care about her but I m realizing that holding on to this friendship is starting to feel more draining than supportive I ve tried explaining my perspective but she doesn t seem to understand where I m coming from In order to respectfully end this friendship what should I say to my friend The End DEAR THE END Tell your friend that you love her but you can t hang out with her now She has made it clear to you that she doesn t like your new lifestyle choices and you are uninterested in doing the things that the two of you used to do together so it feels like a natural time to part avenues DEAR HARRIETTE I in the last few days adopted a dog and while I m excited to have a new companion I m realizing it s a lot more responsibility than I anticipated My schedule is hectic and I m struggling to find enough time for walks training and giving him the attention he demands On top of that my dog has started chewing on furniture getting into things he shouldn t and acting out when I m not home which is creating tension with my roommates I love my dog and want to do right by him but I worry that I m not providing the care guidance or structure he demands I ve tried a limited training techniques I exposed online but they don t seem to be working consistently and I don t want to accidentally make things worse I feel guilty leaving him alone but I can t be home all day with work and other commitments How can I balance my busy life with properly caring for my dog keeping him happy and healthy and correcting his behavior in a way that s effective Doggy SOS Related Articles Miss Manners I came out of the stall and was confronted by a scowling woman Dear Abby She had an astonishing reaction to my family photo Asking Eric My co-worker won t speak to me since my child caused an episode Dear Abby I think my friends should refund my vacation money but they refuse Asking Eric We take secret trips without our other friend Is that wrong DEAR DOGGY SOS Clearly you need help It may be a stretch financially but I recommend that you look into doggy daycare There are facilities that welcome dogs for the day employees play with the dogs groom them feed them and walk them Plus your dog gets to socialize with other dogs Right now your dog is acting out because he is lonely You have to solve that Another effective remedy is to get a kennel for your dog where he can stay while you are away Multiple kennel-trained dogs feel at ease and happy in their kennels while their owners are at work Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO