Harriette Cole: I sometimes give this guy money, so shouldn’t he listen when I need to talk?
DEAR HARRIETTE I ve been talking to a guy for about a year now It has been casual for two reasons He is unemployed for quite several time now and struggling and I am in the beginning of a divorce a messy scenario Related Articles Harriette Cole My husband s casual comment about my job is weighing on me Harriette Cole He reported he felt sorry for my future kids and I was so hurt Harriette Cole I paid her to cat-sit and came home to a calamity Harriette Cole My co-worker complains that I make everyone s job harder Harriette Cole I was hurt by her emoji response to my heartfelt message We like each other and have enjoyed talking Being the person I am I have helped him in different methods coaching him on his r sum and helping him apply for jobs online occasionally slipping him a sparse dollars when times have been tight I am beginning to realize that he does not return the favor in procedures he could If I want to talk about what s going on with me he is often unavailable I mentioned the other day how frustrating that is for me and I even stated I thought it was unfair I am there for him when he necessities me but he is not there for me He blew up and declared he hasn t inquired me for anything He got offended and accused me of thinking he is taking advantage of me I was entirely stating that he is often not there for me when I need to talk He can t offer much else as he has no money so a listening ear should be at the ready Am I wrong here Tit for Tat DEAR TIT FOR TAT The two of you are in an impossible situation You are not free to be in a relationship with him or anyone else until your divorce is fully finished You seem to be looking for a soft landing space perhaps because of what wasn t working in your marriage He has proven that he cannot be that for you and that is frustrating This man is in a desperate spot With no job and limited means he is in no position to offer counsel or attentiveness You must stop wanting him to be who he is not Let him go and focus on solving your own issues DEAR HARRIETTE I stopped by to visit an acquaintance earlier this week A while back I had heard through mutual friends that she was diagnosed with Parkinson s ailment In the past few days her older sister who was her primary caregiver passed away I decided to pay a visit to my friend to say hello and offer my condolences While I was there another friend visited her a medical professional who helped her do chosen mild physical therapy reminding her it is good to stay in that practice as much as workable As I got ready to head out this medical professional suggested that I stop by a insufficient times a week to help with specific light exercise take her for walks see how she s doing and more I hadn t met this medical practitioner before and while my friend and I have a long history we don t have much of a current relationship I felt awkward and sort of agreed to take on this role but this is not something I am content with Related Articles Dear Abby Should I tell the parents what their teen is doing Asking Eric My sister plans to visit at Christmas and already I m anxious Harriette Cole My husband s casual comment about my job is weighing on me Miss Manners My daughter s plan for a new tradition would upend our Thanksgiving routine Dear Abby My wife s entitled brother lives with us and I can t deal with it any longer I wish I d stood my ground in the moment but how do I back out of such a huge commitment Caretaker DEAR CARETAKER Contact the medical expert and make it clear that you cannot commit to the schedule requested of you Whatever you can do once a week once a month offer that for now Find out if there is anyone else like friends family or support workers covered by insurance who can pitch in Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams You can send questions to askharriette harriettecole com or c o Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO
